26 Mar
2002

wow.. my inner cola.

After many a fond weekend living off of Everquest, Dew, and Pizza Hut BBQ pizza, was there any doubt this was my inner cola?


I love you man. You are probably the drink with the most fan clubs ever. A lot of people depend of you and your caffeine content to keep them up all night. Others are just addicted.
Find your inner cola.

26 Mar
2002

It’s all the same, only the names will change. Everyday it seems we’re wasting away.

Since I made it to work alive, despite hydroplaning across nearly two full lanes of traffic, despite going a meager 45 mph on the freeway, and despite nearly having to turn around, go home, and change undies, I decided to write down a few things.

If I had three wishes… First, I’d wish for a young, healthy, athletic body that I could feel comfortable and confident in… I guess thinking Anna Kournikova. Second, I’d wish for musical talent, both vocally and the ability to play instruments well, and write original music and lyrics.. I used to wish I was Sophie B. Hawkins. The third one is tough. I think… cure for cancer. Then I think, fountain of youth and health. Then I think, who really wants to live this life forever, and I wish that reincarnation was a beautiful certainty.

My biggest fears… For years it was watching my parents die, but I guess I’ve sort of faced that one. Now, I think I’m most afraid that one day James will “wake up” and decide seven years older is too much, and no matter how many other ways we may be perfect for each other, the one thing that will drive him away will be the one thing out of my control– my age. Maybe that’s just my biggest paranoia. My actual biggest fear-factor fear that drains the color from my face is flying, buzzing insects… namely bees, but any fast little buzzing thing will send me shivers.

The biggest lie I ever told… Probably the one I feel the worst about is telling my friends and family that Keith O. had asked me as a freshman to the senior prom. He didn’t. He’d just wanted to sleep with me. I knew mom and dad wouldn’t say yes to me going to the prom, so I used that as an excuse why I didn’t see him anymore. In fact, he blew me off totally when he had what he wanted. I never felt so stupid.

The most dumbass thing I did that turned out well… Getting drunk off my ass, making out in public with a strange man so he’ll continue to buy myself and male co-workers drinks, then insisting the nice co-worker who volunteered to drive me home stay the night… insist as in, grab his belt to hold him there and end up breaking it in two, nearly ripping his pants off, ie. making myself look like a total desperate slut. Thankfully finding out he likes desperate sluts who can score free drinks and moving in with him. =) (luv u honey)

Things I’m most thankful for… My special relationship with my mom. The way Dad and I used to be able to say one silly thing and mean something else entirely more meaningful. Having a friend-niece like Angela that can fall back into sync finishing each others thoughts after only a short time together again. Having a bf like James that tells me he feels we were meant to be together for reasons that don’t have to be put into words. Having a best friend that you feel compelled to introduce as family because you care about each other more than any two former strangers are supposed to be able to. Having so many meager, yet creative outlets, so I don’t ever totally feel like my job/life is stale. Having crazy new friends like Kit and Mag who continue to surprise me every day, and don’t complain too much when I vent.

And finally, in the goofiest possible ending, I’m thankful for wonderful 80s music and Atlanta’s new 80s station, where I can listen to Bon Jovi – Dead or Alive while my heart is still pounding from fun-with-water-on-the-road and find myself singing along and being thankful that I’m still here.

25 Mar
2002

pause

Ugh…. Let’s rate this weekend… um. Cant do it.

SO glad came down. SO glad we could stock him for beer for his spring break. SO glad he’s a good sport at sushifest.

Million thanks to and for the help shopping and setting up things. We should have known it was gonna be a good night when we had to sign a form to verify that we weren’t alcohol resellers. Oh my god where did all that liquor go? Note to self… next time at party EAT some of the snacks you put out rather than just arrange and refill them for other people. Another note to self… margaritas and pina coladas just don’t mix well. Did party guests really go out for a 2nd bottle of rum? ugh…

Anyway… the apartment survived, I guess all the guests survived.. though I haven’t talked to Bruce, Jane or Sam since… hrm. I guess it was good.

Sentence most run into the ground over this weekend: “We’ll just look that up on the internet… no wait, the DSL is down.” DSL out from about 4ish Friday until this (Monday) morning. We have discovered we are not only Internet junkies, we’re downright Internet dependent… we don’t have a phone book, we don’t know the channels on the tv, we dont know people’s phone numbers, just email addys…. ugh! What an inconvenient weekend. The most dependent of us managed to go into work for an online gaming fix–you know who you are.

Anyway.. it’s going on 2:30, and I’ve just managed to dig my way out from under huge horrible pile of work for a breath. Of course, with the new-mail-notification alarm comes the answer to my question from co-worker, which leads to me diving back into work. Guess I should do that.

21 Mar
2002

oooh! oooh!

The band that may be called “Civilian” is apparently not only touring with Tool, but they’re on the Ozzfest ticket, too, on the main stage. There’s a quote from Ozzy that Chris Cornell is his “favorite vocalist,” woohoo! Anyway.. tour starts July 7th! I think it’s time for Ozzfest round two!

Did I mention.. woo hoo! – July 28 Atlanta, Ga. Hi-Fi Buys Amph.

Touring for the first time will be the new band featuring Chris Cornell, Tim Commerford, Tom Morello, and Brad Wilk, a project that promises to be stunning on all fronts. The hush-hush recording sessions have spawned rumors of all kinds but the goods will be laid out for all to see on the Ozzfest stage.

Hrm. No word that Marilyn Manson is joining them this year. BUMMER… but oh well. He doesn’t have any tour dates online yet. Whoa.. didn’t realize he did several score pieces for Resident Evil. coo.. wanted to see that anyway. Btw, for interested parties, looks like MM’s website is under revamp, but looking pretty cool. he’s even joined the online journal crowd.. how interesting.

21 Mar
2002

ugh.. lunch break

*whew* had to stop and take a breath today. Been covered up.. it’s nuts.

Lucky me missed March b-day celebration this morning, so no need to resist that cupcake temptation. Whew.. good thing, too. This was a hard to get started morning. Took two cups of coffee to open my eyes today. Spent the first two hours here with various people coming up to me asking me for help on urgent issues to get done today. I think I have 3 days work on my today to-do list, so this at-the-desk lunch will be short.

Just wanted to note here that the “official” party invite went out today, in case I screwed up anything/missed anyone, I wanted to request feedback here. I already know I forgot to mention possible “tampon-art”, provided brings the provisions (although, if you don’t want to get into that Saturday, I’d be in for Sunday afternoon for sure). I also forgot to mention “bring friends”.

Anyway. Need to post that Jim is trying to tempt us into buying UO and all starting the game together. He swears it’s much improved, although it’s flaws didn’t hinder my total addiction to it before. Right now, it’s a money issue.. don’t want to put out the dough for the game or the $10 a month to play.. BUT if JT wants to, and hell, if Maggers gets interested, I’ll probably do it. I do recall how fun those games are, and I still have my resolve that I never got tempted to play Dark Age, no matter how much it called to me.

Other thoughts today… happy late b-day again to Kit (since i missed cupcakes). Oh, I forgot to mention b-day cake at the party. Better send out invite part deux.

20 Mar
2002

stuff

Note to self… you depress yourself. Stop poking your nose where it doesn’t belong. You made an arrangement, whatever insecure crack you were smoking when you did it, and he trusts your honesty about your feelings, so why should he not pursue the options you gave him. You’ve been feeling so close and loved lately, don’t let realizing that he’s out there looking for women to sleep with make you nuts.

20 Mar
2002

pissy dreams

Already told ya, but I just want to remember…

Dreamt JT’s mom called to see if he was home, because he had left her house early, and she had found out some relative was in the hospital. He wasn’t home, so we were both worried where he could be. So I hopped in a car and drove up to Fort. O, except it wasn’t really.. spotted his car parked on the street in front of this line of bars, so I started going in each one until I found him. I remember I kept thinking I saw him, but it wasn’t him, until finally I did find him, sprawled out in the middle of a back room on a bean bag kinda chair. Sitting around the room was a group of people, young girls and guys who all seemed to know him and each other, and amazingly he spots me as I am walking back toward him, and I see him gesturing to people and mouthing words, and when I get close enough I realize he is quickly making introductions. I manage to catch a couple girls names, hear him introduce me to them, and catch their rolled eyes at my appearance. He is wearing his St.Pat’s day shirt, and he is drunk off his ass. He can barely hold his eyes open or sit up, and he keeps looking around. So I tell him that his mom was calling hospitals looking for him, and see if he will come with me, and he loudly tells me that he has plans to pass out there again this evening, and that I should just go on and tell his mom he’s okay. So then I grab his shirt, pull him up to actually look at me, and tell him about whoever being in the hospital, and that it is HIS family, and I drove all this way, and I’d be damned if I left without him. Then I ask for his keys, he tells me the bartender has them, so I tell him to get up, and I turn and walk back to the bar. He manages to get up, but as he is wobbling out of that room, a girl comes running up from out of the bathroom and jumps onto him with a full-body, legs wrapped around, hug that knocks him back into a big chair. She’s in a little white twirly sun-dress, that is nearly pink from all the flowers, and her bright white undies show when she hugs him. She is kissing him hard, and rubbing on him, trying to coerce him into sex in the chair.. he is kissing her back and obliging. SO, with some time to kill, I turn back to the bartender, who is handing me the keys, and spot all sorts of things all over the bar that I manage to sweep across with one arm and send them all crashing to the ground. The bartender just nods and lets me continue. I manage to break just about everything I can get my hands on, but nobody really seems to care or notice. After a few minutes, JT comes weaving his way up to the front, shirt half on, pants half off, obviously sex-stained and not caring. The girl is nowhere in sight, so I turn and walk out to the car, with him behind me. He tries to walk up and put his arm around me… not sure if it was supposed to be loving or he was just wobbly, but I smacked his arm away and nearly sent him to the ground. At this point, I open his passenger door, let him climb in, then head off to make an excuse to my parents, who were apparently waiting in the other car, and tell them that JT is sick, and I have to drive his car home, so they can leave in my car.

Woke up soon after, mostly thinking about how that had turned into a dream where Dad was alive. And of course, woke up SO pissed off at JT… there’s some logic for you.

20 Mar
2002

damn, no Monty Python…

Well, so much for waking up early for work. I guess I’m back to the original plan of work at home in the morning, and go in for the afternoon. James can go to Chatt by himself, since he’s too occupied to come help me sleep. Another night where Dark Age wins. Tv is lame… Cops, Poltergeist 3, American Ninja 2, Law & Order– you know, I swear at any time of day or night you can always find either Law & Order or E.R. on some channel. Oooooh.. Croc Hunter… can’t believe that guy is making a movie… Bugs & Daffy!!! Why didn’t I just START with Cartoon Network.. I swear. Oh.. reminder, scan Spongebob T-shirt from St. Pat’s day. Damn.. too bad no Skinemax.. could be watching Assassins. I swear I think I drank a gallon of water by myself today and I still feel all dried up. Stupid Clarinex, I think. Dry mouth is a side effect, and its apparently a bitch, not to mention how hot it is upstairs.

Well, it seems rumors of Tool touring with “Civilian” in late spring, early summer are true, except for the fact that the tour is in Japan, New Zealand, and Australia. They played Atlanta twice last year it seems… in May and October, so maybe we’ll be lucky and get them again.

Um… could Brittany stop making posters, please? For a minute? Speaking of which… JT, when you read this… go here. There’s you some new wallpaper. Oh.. and you buying shoes tomorrow? Buy me those while you’re at it, will ya? Size 10 (yes 10) Or if you just want to watch the commercial again, “Kiss” is online at the adidas website. Enjoy.

Oh well.. guess i’ll take this glass of I-shouldn’t-have-it-cuz-it’s-caffeine-but-damned-if-i-can-stand-any-more-water upstairs and see if Tom and Jerry can put me to sleep.

19 Mar
2002

at last a moment to stop and take a breath

Whoa what a busy work day… not the typical thing to write in here, but for a change when I don’t go in for a day, I’m actually backed up with work. It was… how do you say.. show? er I mean.. strange…

After looking over the gang’s LJ’s it seems they have the Savannah trip pretty well wrapped up. Gang as in and , though it seems Aoide has gone on to bigger and better birthday ramblings…. =) btw, Happy Birthday, in case I didn’t tell you. Party this weekend…

Oh yeah… party this weekend. REALLY hoping can come down. I’m thinking early afternoonish get together with the small gang, maybe Sushi-fest, piercing-fest, general Atlanta sight-seeing and liquor purchasing… then by evening back to the apartment so other extended “gang” can gather, too. Not sure who all is interested yet. Just a note to Infinite1der, Contour-meet, smontour-meet, Nopi – smopi, we want you in on the parte’… and I planned this first, I’m pretty sure.

Well, for those of you who missed it just stop now and plan to devote about four hours of your life to watching the re-airing of the World Championship Adventure Race on March 24th or 30th. I cannot explain how amazing these people are who make it through this thing… 120 hours of physical endurance tests on maybe 4 hours total sleep… there’s danger, drama, and most of all, you’ll get a sense of the amazing feats a human being is capable of. Enough said, just watch it.

Well… in related news, haven’t totally blown the diet despite the vacation menu fare. Managed to only gain back one pound instead of what would normally for me have been a huge vacation gain. Got plenty of walking exercise, too, which, coupled with Adventure Race enthusiasm, has me doubly psyched to exercise. Had a rather fun bout of tennis (if you’d like to call it that) on the “jungle court” last night with JamesT, and am looking forward to more of the same tonight (soon!) barring rain. Otherwise, it’s to the gym with me! Watching the race and on the long ride home, JT and I discussed doing something big.. like training for a marathon. Personally, i’d like to train for a big climb or something, but I’m not sure what he’s up for. I dream of a vacation set aside just for some unusual physical activity… we’ll see what happens, and well, nothing like a shared goal to motivate me to improve!

Just have to say again what a great mini-vacation this was for me, personally. JT, in case I don’t tell you enough, you’re wonderful & I love you. You know what you did… the whole weekend. You’ve earned many “spoil me” points, which you may cash in at your leisure. =)

On other fronts…. Mom announced my sis will kill me for having a nice sunny weekend while her life was miserable. It seems they were both wishing rain on me, since they were both miserable. Tennessee majorly flooded, but I checked on Mom and she hadn’t floated away, though it seems some campers at the racetrack did. Bet there’s hella cleanup to be done before this Race Weekend at BIR. Race weekend means mom will have company… YIPPEE!! Then the weekend after she CLAIMS to be driving to see me in Atlanta at last… we’ll see. I hear sis is doubting her. The plan is to go on to Easter in Alabama.. which reminds me.. I never did buy that sweet 16 present…. another plan for the weekend, I guess. So, I guess this week will be spent cleaning (despite anti-cleaning inspirational emails from Jimmy) and getting ready for house guests and mom. Will do my best to keep work stress at work, and keep up my motivation to train at home. Attitude is everything… and we have to motivate ourselves, because we can’t depend on anyone else to do that. Speaking of… time to change for tennis.

19 Mar
2002

welcome

Savannah Pics are online, in reduced quality & quantity. Tried to just post the silly ones of us and a few shots to show the crowd and the city.

I guess the one pic that defines the weekend would be:
click me to see more pics

Overall, it was an amazing, fun, relaxing, romantic long weekend, and one of the best vacations I’ve had in a long while. Mix tequila shots, feather boas, beads thrown from balconies, 2-foot tall pina coladas, several blocks of cobblestones crowded elbow to asshole with drunk people, tons of good food, great hotel room view, sunny-80+ degree weather, silly-sweet bfs who dont get embarassed when you show your tits, and warm early-summer breezes as you sit and listen to the street performers into the wee hours of the morning and you get one fabulous trip. The pictures don’t do it justice.

Anyway.. made it to Ice Age, which rocked, with it’s fab Star Wars trailer. Witnessed the laziest woman on the planet at said movie… huge, 300+ lbs woman seated in theater uses cell phone to call information to get theater number, then call theater manager to tell him there’s a dark line across the screen on the pre-show slides. James is like.. “Lazy bitch, take the 20 steps and go tell the usher,” but it was obvious this lady didn’t make any movements if she didn’t have to, hence the poundage.

Interesting overheard quote of the trip, “Well, I have to tell you that you’re a little acidic, mister.” I’ll let the context of that one be unexplained.

There’s so much more to tell, but after taking a day off, it seems I have some piled up work to catch up on.

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