Where we stand…

There is still one item that is being tested. The test should be completed in the next hour. If everything goes as planned everything should be running out of Chicago by 4PM Est.

Okay. Here I sit, a whole hell of a lot of venting out of my system, but still feeling mostly crappy in general. No word on car yet. Looks like no climbing today… Kit is poor and James will be in Chattanooga… and well, who knows when I’ll have a car back. I could stand not to. I could stand to go home and work on this project that I can’t seem to concentrate on here at work. I wish I were at home. I wish I wasn’t stuck here sans vehicle. I wish I’d slept worth a damn.

It doesn’t seem like we’re going to hear any job news today–David Camp’s not even here. Everyone seems to be so concerned over our server migration issues that they all forgot that we’re on the verge of unemployment. I want to say I don’t even care, but obviously it’s bothering me to the point that I’m an angry sulking lump a full 24 hours before I had to be here today. James says to me things like, “Not like you haven’t known this was coming.. ” and “you keep saying you’re going to work on your portfolio” and “you need to be job hunting” and he’s totally right on all counts, but it doesn’t change the fact that this whole thing is weighing on me and just making me super bummed. Just like a man to point out the solution instead of sympathizing, huh? Well.. he is right. And, I guess I’m not so much moaning and wanting sympathy all the time (except now) as just moping and feeling shut down. Overwhelmed. Frustrated. I know, I know. Who likes looking for a job… get over it.

Anywho… can’t think of a more perfect feeling thing than floating in the warm swimming pool with JamesT late last evening. Trying to hold onto that feeling. Trying to wrap my foggy brain around some moderately original new site design today. Trying to compose an appropriate email reply to mom about changing her mind on selling the house again. “It’s been a bad summer” she said… Well, yeah it has. For everybody. And things don’t seem to be looking up.