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Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Wednesday, August 20, 2003 at 10:47 am by flerly.

Can you feel it, see it, hear it today?
If you can’t, then it doesn’t matter anyway
You will never understand it cuz it happens too fast
And it feels so good, it’s like walking on glass…

What is it? Is it?

Just Wednesday. Part came in for my car, so they say it will be done today and I’ll be out of this crappy rental car. Still no shell access to our live servers, so still unproductive in a rework sort of way, which is good, since I have one work day remaining to come up with my brilliant new site design. Spent four days pretty much “thinking”, researching, planning, reading about new methods, wireframing out sites the customer liked to see what I can use.

DSL is out at home all last night and still the same this morning. Dunno why, but it made staying home this morning to work a bit impossible. I guess it’s better I show my face around here for a bit anyway… never know when these people might be going away to never come back, and I do like most of them.

Have to say that in my innocent looking through websites that I’ve done and been sort of proud of for this company, that I quite rudely ran across one that had been fucked up by another designer here… in that they altered my header image and left the rest the same. So, my lovely page that all flowed together and looked so nice, now has a big square header graphic with the exact same logo that is already repeated directly below in the content area, which doesn’t even stretch as wide across the page as the content or footer area. Lovely. I’m sure it all happened at some dumbass customer’s request and whoever got the request didn’t have the heart to send it my way because it is so obviously a fuckup. C’est la vie. Mark that site off my proud of list.

Talked to mom for over an hour last night. She’s stubborn and I’m apathetic. She doesn’t want to move… now or ever, I think. So, she’s not going to move. She thinks everyone is pressuring her. She is worried what would happen to all that money she’d end up with in savings if she sold all that property. Worried in a “what if I get addicted to e-bay?” sort of way. Last thing she told me, “well, I can afford to live here so long as I don’t live all that much longer.” Great plan, mom. I of course told her if she didn’t like me and never wanted to have to make the drive down to visit me that she didn’t have to be so drastic as to die to avoid it. We’re morbid, I know. We ended up discussing how I need to send her good directions so if she doesn’t make it in “person” that she’ll know where to haunt later. Bottom line, she said, she is kicking herself for “snap decisions” she made after Dad died, like giving away his truck and a lot of tools for nothing, and is trying to take her time with the decision to sell the house and shop so she won’t regret it. It doesn’t matter how long she takes, if she sells, she will regret it, that’s just how it is. Not that she should stay there unless she consents to let people help her out financially or discovers some new vocation for extra bucks… but, that’s just how it is. She’ll be sad, and bored, and lonely, and do nothing but wish she were back in the old house from the moment she sells it. Money in the bank won’t matter. She still won’t know how to travel or have fun.

Well now. Isn’t that special. To solve our problems today, give me shell access… I now have root. Got root? Aye. Guess I’ll get to some work now.

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