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Proud to be a WWE watching, small-minded, ego-centric @%#! with no regard for my fellow man

Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Saturday, October 2, 2004 at 8:08 am by flerly.

I just got this obnoxious red and blue, 18 pt Comic Sans email from “Alabama way”…

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for squirting out babies.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts!

I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion. I don’t think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers.

The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television,and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the UnitedCaucasianCollege Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America and see what happens. Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are different,weird, or tick me off. When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70%of the population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the law of statistics.

I know what sex is, and there are not varying degrees of it. If I received sex from one of my subordinates in my office, it wouldn’t be a private matter or my personal business. It would be "FIRED" immediately!

I believe that if you are selling me a milk shake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen you should have to speak English!.

My father and grandfather should not have died in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.

I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can’t understand the order"freeze" or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation recount vot es when needed. I know what the definition of lying is.

I don’t think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document and open to their interpretations.

I don’t hate the rich. I don’t pity the poor. I know wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television, and that doesn’t stop you from watching them. I believe a self-righteous liberal or conservative with a cause is more dangerous than a Hell’s Angel with an attitude.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that’s better and put your name on the building. Ask your buddy that invented the Internet to help you..

It doesn’t take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid and smack his/her little ass when necessary and say "NO".

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don’t pretend they are a political statement. And please st ay home until that new lip ring heals, I don’t want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me french fries!

I am sick of "Political Correctness" and of all the suck ups that go along with it. I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa, so how can they be "African Americans"?
Besides, Africa is a continent. I don’t go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe. I am proud to be from America and no where else.

And if you don’t like my point of view, tough!

If you are not ashamed of America, forward this to everyone in your address book while you can still do it for free.

I guess I am ashamed of America, because my gut reaction to this was, “Whoa, these people never heard the phrase ‘Thou shalt love thy fellow man as much as thyself.'” I may not be “the religious type,” but I am generally moral, and I do have compassion and an understanding of why the world isn’t black and white, or red and blue as this muddle of convoluted issues would have you think.

If nothing else, the phrase “squirting out babies” just added a special air of class to this whole thing. It also made me come to the realization that I have family who fall in line with so many others in the country with similar “pride” in America and are thusly supporting a poor-spoken president with a similar cowboy attitude who has turned America into the snot-nosed bully of the world.

Even if we want to keep the argument here separating “church and state” by not considering God’s commandments as we read this, lets at least consider Human Rights. I bet the concept of “world peace” totally ruffles their feathers.

Oh well. With over 50% of Americans content to spew boiled-down catch phrases without any thought to rhyme or reason, and with this obnoxious surge of so-called “American Pride” fueling him, I guess I don’t need to be surprised when George W. Bush wins another four years.

In light of that, I guess I am a little ashamed to be an American. I can hear in my head the soundbyte of GWB reiterating Kerry’s phrase “Global Test” to a booing audience, and I have to wonder whether he is actually spinning that to his advantage or whether he just didn’t get it. Does he really believe that the morality of the world is so different from America’s morality that we could not justify a reason to go to war in a global forum? Kerry didn’t say we need to seek global approval; what he said was that the commander-in-chief should ask himself, do we have circumstances that could stand up and be seen the same way in a global forum, because that would mean it would be a decision that the world should get behind if there was a need for that unity — as opposed to some gut reaction akin to a good old-fashioned feud.

I am proud to be a tolerant, forward-thinking, world-conscious American, who recognizes that diversity makes us stronger and believes that people should care about each other, whether they pray to the same God or not.

And if you don’t like my point of view, tough! GET OVER IT!!! Sorry… that should have been purple and in 30 pt Georgia.



  1. schlemaggle has made a Comment


    If nothing else, the phrase “squirting out babies” just added a special air of class to this whole thing.

    that’s a beautiful phrase. even more beautiful than all of the excellent <"PUNCTUATION"!!!!!!!.. used in the email.

    October 2, 2004 @ 3:34 am

  2. flerly has made a Comment

    Yeah… “wow” is a good reaction. I could just picture the sender enjoying life sitting on the porch of their big house guarding their big car with a big shotgun. This is complete back-woods, “Tresspassers will be shot” attitude. It makes me sick to think that “Americans” can only be wealthy, white people who can’t see that their own generations of bigotry have created the need for things like the United Negro College Fund in an attempt to equalize a very unbalanced society.

    October 2, 2004 @ 3:57 am

  3. skjarl has made a Comment

    You dirty, liberal hippies.

    October 2, 2004 @ 4:16 am

  4. dark_corvus has made a Comment

    Wow…what obnoxious tripe! Good for you for decrying it 🙂

    October 2, 2004 @ 7:04 am

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