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Rockford? Wear the fox hat.

Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Friday, August 12, 2005 at 1:17 pm by flerly.

It’s a new record … a 23-minute weekly conference call. Steve was going to be 10 minutes late for the call, thus giving Lloyd the opportunity to turn everyone’s “one-minute updates”, which are actually more like 5-minute updates, into one-sentence updates. We’d gotten through almost everyone before Steve joined and started asking questions. To whom? Why, to me, of course. He would join in the middle of my sentence, and ask the stupidest question ever.

[Insert your own white-noise array of static from someone’s crappy cell phone as background to this scenario]
So, Kimberly, if we didn’t have to worry about customers approving anything and we just moved forward with whatever you made, how many of these sites do you think you could turn on in a month?
Well, considering that someone at the office has to set up the site info to create the space before I could add graphics…
No, no … if all that was done, how many?
Are you saying I’m both creating new site graphics and cutting them or just working with cutting mockups that are already done?
If everything is already done, how many?
Well… that is a situation that would never happen. Cutting graphics and all, the most I’ve done is three in a week, but I can probably do one a day in your scenario, considering all the internal images and the css adjustments I have to make with each upload.
What if all that were done, then how many?
You’re asking me, if the site graphics were made, assumed approved, cut, and all internal images made and stylesheets updated to match, everything has been stored in the proper directory structure, then all I had to do was maybe zip and then upload them…. then the answer is, about as fast as it takes to transmit the zipped file via FTP, but that’s a ridiculous scenario.

But, he seemed satisfied.

Egad. I’m still waiting on information on the super-secret project, codenamed “Harpoon”?!? that I’m supposed to start work on over the weekend. I think Lloyd has entirely too much fun calling random things super-secret and giving them codenames. He also had too much fun sending out his “foxhat” video to the group before the call, so he could use the phrase everytime Steve talked about their travelling next week.

Rockford? Wear the fox hat.
Outside of Chicago.



  1. squatting_jedi has made a Comment

    You have super-secret projects? hehe

    August 12, 2005 @ 5:12 pm

  2. flerly has made a Comment

    Oh yeah. The last “super-secret” project was the one that filled our break room fridge with beer and relocated all the soft drinks to the fridge in the conference room. I’m sure that one had a nifty code name, too.

    August 12, 2005 @ 5:16 pm

  3. anonymous has made a Comment

    I don’t get this Foxhat thing?

    August 15, 2005 @ 3:21 pm

  4. flerly has made a Comment

    Okay… read these out loud for me:

    “I am”
    “sofa king”
    “we Todd Ed”

    Now, still out loud.. all together, a little faster. You say funny thing!

    August 15, 2005 @ 3:26 pm

  5. flerly has made a Comment

    Jean Chretien is making an official state visit to Maple Ridge. All the locals are quite excited to have the Prime Minister come to their town for the first time ever, and they’ve prepared quite a welcome for him. When he steps off of the plane, everyone is quite taken aback to see the P.M., while dressed otherwise quite normally, looking especially resplendent in a magnificent fox hat – like a Daniel Boone coonskin, only made of fox. The cameras are clicking away as he steps off the plane.

    After the official greetings are over, and the mayor of Maple Ridge has a private moment with the P.M. away from the cameras and onlookers, he finally unleashes his curiosity.

    “Excuse me, Mr. Prime Minister, but I must ask. I have never seen you wearing this magnificent fox hat before, and I wonder why you chose to wear it to our humble town?”

    The P.M. replies:”Well, monsieur mayor, eh, ‘dat is quite simple, you see. When I was leaving da ‘ouse dis morning, I said to my wife, Aline, I said, ‘Aline, I am going to Maple Ridge for dah firs’ time today! Do you thank I should wear uh anythang speshal in honour of dis inaugural visit?’ And Aline, my wife, she said to me:

    ‘Maple Ridge? Where da fock’s ‘at?'”

    August 15, 2005 @ 3:47 pm

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