humorous crooners, nekkid photos, and worlds falling apart

Beth: What does E.T. stand for?
Audience member: Cos if he ever lay down he’d never be able to get up!
Beth: Right! It’s the short little legs, you see…

I’ll be lazy and just link over to Bradthemad’s Beth Orton entry, since he did a better job with photos than we did, and included the hair mountain that we were behind. Although, I’m surprised he didn’t mention the guy’s wooden staff complete with rawhide tassels and this thing that tells time. Dude was already trashed to the point of lolling his head back in near-passing-out (giving Brad a lap full of hair) before the opening act started, but his crazy “old-lady” kept waking him up to give him another bottle of beer. He, of course, thanked her once by leaning over close to let loose a resounding belch in her ear. The rest of the time, he just alternated between drinking the beers and sleeping sitting up–head lolling.

Anyway… I have to mention that Motley is currently in her laundry basket “prison”. She’s slid it past the stairs down 3 or 4 times, but hasn’t quite figured out that the stairs are the key to her escape. Kitty is lazily watching her push the basket back and forth on the linoleum. It is entertaining.

So, seeing the show last night made me think of the frewtnut niece, whom I had sent a link to the Beth Orton San Diego date back around Valentine’s day. Almost called her up from the car on the way home, but didn’t. Then came home to her voice on the machine. So, called her at nearly midnight our time. And, as fate would have it… got Dennis instead, who informed me that I’m too old to be up this late and that I should put the phone down and go to bed. I’m honestly not sure what else we talked about, since he was clearly in a goofy mood (normal mood) and brain going about 800 mph having fun with me while clearly torturing Angela by not letting her have the phone. Somewhere in there he said he’d let me talk to her if I’d send nekkid photos, and when I asked “of whom?” he relented with a “You’re no fun.” and gave me to the niece.

So, poor frewtnut. Her world is flip-turning upside down. On the bright side, D isn’t being sent to help find land mines, but he is instead being sent to Japan for 6 months or so. It’s just what he wants.. she told me. He’s got a thing for Asian chicks, doesn’t he? I asked. Oh yeah. So, I told him he wasn’t allowed off the boat. For 6 months. Stay on the boat. And call me every day. Every hour. Twice.

Add to that her live-in nanny is getting married (can you say green-card?) and moving out, her job is going to 4-10 hour days with those fun longer hours that makes regular day-care harder to find, AND her two senior co-workers are quitting, leaving her as top-dog in a department of her and “one dumb new guy”. I asked, Dumb, as in new and will learn? or Dumb, as in new and will never learn?. She said, He once asked me about something, then when I started to explain he stopped me to say that he apologized but he had totally zoned out and could I start again. So I did. Then he stopped me and said, could I start again because he wasn’t getting it, so maybe if he wrote everything I said down, he could read it later and get it. So, I did, and he wrote down every word. Then… few days later. He asked me again. He said he’d lost his notes. Hopeless.

Well, this lunch-break post has been fun, but I have shit to do. Must get some shit done for a customer before his afternoon call, piles of laundry still to do (More thanks to Motley, the notorious “laundry-basket pisser”), and I’d like to at least make an effort to clean up this joint before Brad’s brother gets into town today. Must make sure Motley hasn’t decided to mark the guest-sheets again before he gets here. That sure was fun last time Marc & Jennie stayed.

Going to be a full week. Meh, who had time to drive to Greenville for the not-sold-out NIN concert Thursday night anyway. EEK.. must go. Brad’s poltergeist is making his speakers go nuts again.