I’m a spammer tonight, and I’m dating myself with the reference, but this was just weird….

Dr. Sbaitso called me on the phone to make sure I had adequate anti-fraud protection on my credit cards. Yes, Dr. Sbaitso, beloved conversationalist of those early 90s soundblaster sound cards, who got a million laughs with his wacky pronunciations, was seriously concerned as to how I would deal with having my purse or wallet stolen.

Yet, it was not an automated message. He reacted when I spoke. He answered my questions. When I finally interrupted him, he used all the extra words that people do when you catch them off guard and they must veer from their written sales pitch… all the “well” and “um” and “so” and the like.

It sounded like someone was trying to use an electronic device to mask their true voice or perhaps a thick accent, and it came out, completely unnaturally inflectioned and chopped in a perfect impression of Dr. Sbaitso. It was so odd, I almost let the “guy” get through his whole spiel just so I could hear more of the bizarre voice. Oh, how I lamented having answered on the upstairs phone without a speakerphone, as I was waving at JamesT to come over and trying to describe what was happening in a whisper to him.

In the end, he wished me a good evening and hung up, and I continue to babble about and be amazed at the weird call. So… already we’re farming out customer service to India and giving the reps American names, now we’re using voice software to mask their accents? Is anybody really fooled by this?

W. T. F.