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Oh! My Hip! — Now I can forecast rain!

Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Tuesday, June 5, 2007 at 2:57 pm by flerly.

Okay, I don’t have enough crap going on, now I think I’ll injure myself! Mission accomplished! One sleepless night, half of which was spent on the floor trying to stretch or pop or unpinch or whatever my own leg, one failed attempt at the inversion bar to magically fix everything, and one call and quick fit-in visit to the thankfully VERY close by chiropractor later, I am still in pain, but not nearly so much.

[14:23] flerly: I just got back from the chiropractor who tells me i have a charlie horse in my groin muscle.
[14:24] Skittles: fun
[14:24] flerly: yeah, great fun.
[14:26] Skittles: so how do you fix it?
[14:28] flerly: well, apparently, since it “charlie horsed” instead of pulled, it had the great fortune of pulling on my leg somehow and getting it sort of out of socket, which is why i was crying in pain last night. The chiro popped my leg and did some adjustments, now i just have to do this bizarre stretch that looks like i’m humping the floor until i can get the muscle knot to release
[14:30] flerly: it is apparently mostly the result of a lifetime habit of “sitting funny” at my desk, as in sort of half indian style, with one leg cocked up, and that resulted in me not stressing both hips equally… which caused one to get too stressed
[14:30] flerly: so last night i’m sitting indian style in the floor going through some boxes, and when i get up, suddenly my left leg is completely out of whack
[14:31] Skittles: you need to see dale
[14:31] flerly: i love dale and all, but there is a short list of people who i think i’d let massage my groin muscles =)
[14:31] Skittles: i hear ya
[14:31] Skittles: good point
[14:35] flerly: i think i’m just at that age… where my lifetime of bad habits is starting to catch up with me
[14:36] flerly: the chiro said you really have to take care in life to try to “stress” your body equally on both sides. That even a little thing like always sleeping on the same side of your body can lead to shoulder and hip problems on that side after a while
[14:36] flerly: it was kinda funny, though
[14:37] flerly: while she was essentially massaging my butt cheek on that side, she told me, “Don’t take this the wrong way, but your muscle here is rock hard… in a good way.”
[14:38] Skittles: woot
[14:39] Skittles: bootcamp
[14:39] flerly: i guess. so apparently there’s some muscle under this flab somewhere. A doctor has now confirmed that for me.
[14:40] flerly: not visible to the naked eye, yet, but through scientific study, it can be discovered
[14:41] Skittles: please

I’d also copy the oh-so-sympathetic string of emails from co-workers about “lame excuses that keep us from a decent days work”, but there’s just too many of them. Suffice it to say, Lloyd’s list of now apparently acceptable excuses for missing work include hangnails.


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