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what is it about dreams lately?

Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Thursday, January 31, 2002 at 12:39 pm by flerly.

Talking to a friend who seems to alternate days with me to start our conversation with “I had the weirdest dream last night”. I recorded my latest bit of subconscious-telling nonsense here privately yesterday, and this morning I hear from him he had a freaky sex dream where he was with a beautiful girl he hadn’t slept with in a long time and somehow she was suffocating him. He said he woke up with a terrible sore chest like he’d been coughing all night.. made him wonder about what’s dreaming and what’s real.
Seems like I took a survey the other day that indicated if you had a more enjoyable dreamlife than waking life, to the extent that you wanted to spend most of your time asleep, then you were probably headed into a spiral of depression.

I so think i’m already there. No motivation at work, no motivation at home, so you’d think I had no goals at all. Actually, I have the biggest goal in the world, I told myself that I was going to lose weight once and for all with the motivation of fitting into a nice, sexy little dress to get married in. But, since then I’ve managed to not only put back on the weight I lost last fall, but pack on a few extra pounds to go with them. When I’m in this funk I can’t help but think it’s my subconscious telling me that I don’t really expect to get married. I guess I am waiting for him to say April Fools or something. It’s all in my head, though. (And hanging over of the top of my pants… *sigh*)

So, note to self, get real. Get your shit together and get things going. You’ve got people wanting to work out with you, including a boyfriend who you are dumb to be embarrassed in front of who would be happy to go to the gym with you, play some tennis, or even just do some funky pilates tape with you like he enjoys it or something. You always hear change doesn’t happen overnight, but remember, change doesn’t happen at all if you don’t get off your ass and start.


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