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“We are now entering Hell. Please keep your hands and elbows inside the car.” – Daria

Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Wednesday, October 9, 2002 at 11:27 am by flerly.

Top Box Office
1. Red Dragon
2. Sweet Home Alabama
3. The Tuxedo
4. My Big Fat Greek Wedding
5. Barbershop
6. Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie
7. The Banger Sisters
8. The Four Feathers
9. Moonlight Mile
10. One Hour Photo

Opening This Week
Brown Sugar
Knockaround Guys
The Rules of Attraction
The Transporter
Tuck Everlasting
White Oleander

Well, I’ve seen one movie from the list above… Just haven’t been in a while. I want to go this Friday, after cheese. Thus is my plan. Must find a suitable partner in crime, as I think JT will be occupado or asleep-upado after a day at Petit LeMans. And, well, Sam is staying over for the weekend, so I need to figure out an elsewhere to be. THOUGHT I could worm my way into some interesting Saturday plans, but it seems now to be postponed until new tires are purchased. Bummer.

I can’t shoot my own mother. Not with paint anyway. –Daria

So.. called Mom, talked to Mom, woke her up but she won’t admit it. She doesn’t talk into the phone when she’s half asleep, so I miss her deep meaningful question “Is everything all right?” and sit silently waiting for her to speak clearly. At last I hear.. “You didn’t answer that one, something must be wrong.” I’m like.. “Mom, I didn’t hear you, speak into the phone.”

This goes on for a while. I tell her I talked to my niece who told me all about her trip to visit her mom/my sis. So, my mom tells me she talked to my sis who told her all about niece’s visit. In short, we tell each other the same stories back and forth, stories about fun other people have had, until I can’t stand it anymore. She is disappointed I didn’t come “over the mountain” to visit this weekend on my motorcycle trip. “I wasn’t in control of the bike, mom”… “You have a car.” yeah, good come back, mom. “It just didn’t work out, okay?” We end up talking about concerts… me going to Rush, sis going to Paul McCartney, Mom listening to A.M. radio (“which I didn’t know even existed anymore”) and finally wrap it up in just over an hour. Typical call.

Jake:”See those berries? That’s our breakfast! See that stream? That’s our drinking water!”
Daria:”See that skeleton? That’s our future.”

Made you look…

Jeez, I have injured my neck. No doubt at the gym. It is SO freaking sore. I’ve been putting ointment on it all morning and covering the scent of ointment with stinky GAP lotion, stretching, doing head-rolls, but NOTHING is helping. Wish I’d brought my certificate for my free chiropractor adjustment with me. I know it was the strain from that evil funky AB machine.

Mr. O’Neill: Right here and now, let’s pledge to make Daria’s dream a reality.
Daria: You mean the one where people walking down the street burst into flames?

Another fun-filled day at work. Why don’t I have a scanner? You know. you’d think a person with as much stuff to scan as regularly as I do would say.. have a scanner and not have to rely on crap scanned by “data department” folks that looks so shitty I end up spending a good hour just fixing it… when it was a nice clear image that I could have scanned myself to look fine.

Oh yeah.. can’t forget to mention my new toy… my precious.. It’s the Darth Maul shown in this article.

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