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Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Saturday, November 9, 2002 at 9:40 pm by flerly.

All these clothes just come between us
Let’s go where no one can see us
My skin, my lips need to lick your fingertips
I feel the need to be naked with you

I just think I’m going to have to break down and order some of these Amber cds. I’m enjoying what I’ve pulled down so far.

This Is Your Night 1996
Amber 1999
Naked 2002

Happy, ass-shaking, dance music. It’s all kinda nice.

Tonight with my spirits, the one that you call
I’m ready to stand up, and ready to fall
I can’t find a way, so attracted by you
Let me be your girl, and I’ll be so true, ooh

Spent too much time getting too into chats with folks that are fun and distracting, bump up the old self-image, but really mean nothing…

Meanwhile, phone call from JT…

“Yeah, I’m having some fun” he said. “The fish aren’t biting. We’re about to go blow some money in a casino, I guess. Love you, I’ll try to call tomorrow.”

His phone is breaking up. He can’t even call unless he goes into town. Stupid middle-of-nowhere swamp/lake.

I say I miss him. I say I love him. I’m not sure he even heard.

Already the plan isn’t working out. Was a total pig today. Didn’t go on the planned hike. Stayed up too late and slept until 2, feeling like shit all night. Still sorta feel like death. My chest feels full of crap to cough up. The plan was to severely diet, to exercise in some fun different way, and to write on that lagging novel.

Yeah, instead I’ve put 2,000 words into LJ today. And still going.

I still sorta want to write about the weird conversation with Greg. It sort of.. surprised me. I had told him about my dream the other night (which I posted about) about me laughing at something serious his wife was trying to say to me.. just to tell him about me coughing in my sleep…. Apparently, he had been most interested in what the three of us might have been discussing so seriously in my dream, but he hadn’t wanted to ask over lunch when I’d told the story. So, he asked over chat… and I must say was disappointed that the discussion was irrelevant and forgotten by me. The story was about how I couldn’t cough while laying on my stomach and how that filtered into my dream.

He expressed the wish that I’d had a more interesting answer than that.

So we talked about more interesting things. For me, it was simply conversation. I was actually surprised at his suggestion when I wanted to sign off, that I had been a tease. Seriously.. surprised.

We’d talked freaky stuff ranging from Jason to horse-fuck videos we’d seen to porn he recommended for JT about certain tennis starlets. We talked about the online business he and his wife are starting selling sex toys, and I suggested maybe Stacy could help him out with some inventory leftover from her old days in the sales biz. It was an adult conversation, yes, but a far cry from cyber sex.

Yeah. Guess I’m a tease because I’d mentioned some awful bestiality video i’d seen where there was a sound like a gunshot when this horse ejaculated, and I couldn’t manage to dig it up for him. Couldn’t imagine why I wouldn’t save a thing like that I guess.

Anyway.. I guess the desire to talk about that stuff has passed. Just took me a while to digest and process the whole thing. And now.. I’ve wasted a whole damn Saturday, sleeping in.. watching 8 mile.. watching old Enterprise episodes from the net… reading evil Laurell K. Hamilton books… and typing away at the LJ to try to capture some of the thoughts bouncing around in this skull so I can move on.

Well. It’s late. No going out tonight, except maybe to return these Blockbuster movies from last Saturday’s surprise movie night. No. No going out.

Perhaps I can still salvage a Sunday out of this weekend.


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