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just pondering…

Posted in Crazy Wisdom on Monday, March 4, 2002 at 10:44 pm by flerly.

…. I don’t know if anyone here has ever actually READ my old web page, including the not-so-flattering tales of my sweet/dumb little step-niece in Alabama.. but I figured since I’m not updating that page, I might as well just post her latest brilliant exploit here…

Someday, when she finds this online and reads it… hopefully she’ll look back and say along with us.. “boy, I was dumb.”

So… she lives with her natural father, a very strict man, and my sister, her step-mom, a pretty strict lady with the experience of already raising one great kid, aka my SUPER niece, former Hawaii res, the infamous Tropicalfrewtnut.

Anyway, so after a recent visit to see her real mom, who lives in Atlanta, my niece goes home to backwater-Alabama-town with a nice assortment of Victoria’s secret thong panties. My sis notices them in the wash, but thinks.. What the hell, she’s the one who has to wear the uncomfortable things and just lets her be. To her misfortune, however, her father happens to notice them as my sis is taking them out of the dryer… and with a Who the hell do THOSE belong to? followed by the true, but not mood lightening remark from my sister of Well, I believe you’d notice if they were mine, her father proceeds to grab a pair up and go off to confront his young, misguided daughter.

Well, before we get to the punchline, let me just inform reader(s) that my dear niece is 15 on the verge on senile. Her sweet 16 birthday is day after tomorrow, and she is SO close to being out of that house that she can taste it. She has a boyfriend that she is severely chaperoned with, and has requested to be put on birth control, which only elicited a negative response along with more strict chaperoning. (Her parents don’t want to look like they are giving permission for her to have sex… )

Anyway.. when the dear sweet little thing is confronted by her angry father, thong undies in hand, she proceeds to tell him that she needs them, because she is about to turn 16 and have a car, and she and her friends have already planned the big drinking party to really celebrate her birthday, after which she plans to have sex with her boyfriend, probably in the car.

@!@!**#@@!*$*%^(#* What?!?!??!

Well…. dumb. She is just dumb. She may be honest.. she may be trying to “shock” them, but she is just dumb.

Sure I disagree with them about the birth control.. I think she should be on it. If she’s asking for it, hell yes give it to her. This is the same little girl who has been going on about how cool it is for the grandmothers to show up at her school sporting events to care for the babies of the girls on the team with her. She has friends who got pregnant at 14. I am actually SUPRISED that she hasn’t had sex already, but thankfully, the way she talked about the “sex in the car” thing, it just sounded like she was planning her first time.

Personally… I’ve always thought her parents were too strict, but the more I hear about the kids in that part of the country… where it is apparently so backwater that there’s not much to do for fun but each other and then raise the babies… maybe their strictness is all that has saved her up to this point. But, from her reaction to their strictness, I only have doubts about her future. I really don’t want to see her in 5 years, married to the dumb jock who couldn’t even pass his exit exam from high school, raising their love child in some trailer in Alabama…. but sadly, just don’t see many other options. Seems like the whole situation is kind of at the point where there’s no way to go but further down the spiral.

So now, I’m stuck pondering the perfect sweet 16 gift… the one thing that I could give her that might turn her life around… and I just don’t see what it is. I don’t think it exists…


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