*sigh*

It’s the only thing to do right now… breathe and be calm.

Well, I think I’ve managed to solve my Atkins lunch problems. I was getting so tired of just bringing in meat and cheese. DUH, I bought low-carb breads, why don’t I pull them out of the freezer? So, I did.. and had a good ham and swiss sandwich today, with bacon, lettuce, tomato and mayo AND packed a little salad.. just lettuce, cheese, & olives, and damned if that didn’t just hit the spot. The more I read in my fitness magazines about fiber fiber fiber.. the more I wonder if Atkins is really healthy for me. Then I remember, Atkins doesn’t say no fiber, it just says good fiber… whole grains. I’m just going to have to make smarter food choices and build better lunches… then maybe I won’t end up running out to the grocery and grabbing little bags of sugar-free candies to tie me over. This is me raiding the trash from yesterday… Nestle Sugar Free Turtles, minus the fiber and sugar alcohols, they were 2 net carbs a serving, the whole bag was 2.5 servings, so 15 carbs of candy yesterday.. all by itself. But, that’s 400 calories consumed in a flash. And here lately.. with the Slender ice cream.. and the milkshakes.. sure, they’re low-carb choices, but am I doing myself a favor not trying to fill up on really good low-carb choices instead? I really think I need to not just count carbs, but think about where I’m getting them from.

Blah, this is me rambling. I was about convinced to start a food and exercise journal last night. I know I’ve been doing fine on carbs for a while now, but I’m really not losing any more weight. I’ve been stuck at my “so yeah I cheated a little at the wedding and had cake and stuff” weight, which is a total of 20lbs loss for a while now. JamesT says, and I agree, that I need to kick up the exercise. He’s willing (if not thrilled, I know) to help me… so yesterday afterwork we went to the pool and played water frisbee like fools, and treaded water, and talked about crap, and it was very pleasant (for me).

I’ve read an article recently about “fat trouble spots” and what causes certain people to store fat in certain areas. I’d say I have 2 trouble spots, my lovingly named “grinch gut” and my upper arms. Well, the article says that both are areas where fat will be stored due to a breakdown of chemicals in the body caused by stress. The cure, per the magazine, is to learn how to deal with your stress, so that you don’t get those unhealthy chemical breakdowns, so that your regular diet and exercise routine can and will affect those areas normally. Well, why didn’t I think of that. The article suggests developing a routine of stress management, but didn’t really suggest what that might include.

I guess maybe that’s something I should do a little more reading about. So far, all I know is that I’ve let myself, over the last 10 years or so, get myself stuck in a rut of bad body habits. Not just my bad posture, which I’m really trying to work on, but also the bad habit of letting stress cause me to shut down. I’ve been all too aware that lots of people let stress cause them to eat more, so I’ve always tried to refrain from that, but I never thought twice about going home on a particularly bad day and either curling under the blankets for some extra sleep or just climbing into a bubble bath and crying over things. By changing the habit and making myself do some physical exertion on those bad stressful days, even for just a few minutes… like a stretching routine before that bubble bath… I would be doing my body such a favor.

Anyway.. I’m still babbling. People are starting to filter back in from lunch, so I’d better get back to work. Since technically our last day this month is Monday, I’m hoping that it won’t be a late day today. That means that I will have some work which I absolutely cannot neglect to do over this weekend, but if it means I won’t miss cheese during this hell week, then it’s worth it.